Starring David Keith, Simmone Jade MacKinnon, Mark Sheppard, Sean Whalen, and more unconvincing CGI eel creatures than you can shake a stick at.

Directed by Paul Joshua Rubin

Sometimes a movie just pisses you off. Deep Shock pissed me off.

A Jaws-style thriller about a giant, man-eating electric eel? From all the info I had been able to gather that's what I expected Deep Shock to be. In fact, I even described it as such in an article I wrote up for Creature Corner this past summer documenting all the upcoming "nature run amok" movies coming out before year's end. Call me crazy but a Jaws-style killer animal movie about a monstrous electric eel sounded like it could be jolly good b-movie fun even if it was produced by the crapmasters at UFO Films. Then I actually watched the movie when it premiered on the Sci-Fi Channel. Then I contemplated throwing a heavy object through my television screen. Someone bring me the head of producer Phillip J. Roth! The man owes me my Jaws-style giant killer electric eel flick!

I had no intention of ever writing a review of this film for Creature Corner. For one thing, Deep Shock really isn't even a horror movie or, for that matter, that much of a monster movie. But here I am punching this out right now to warn everyone who saw that box art, which even I must admit is pretty damn spiffy, and that description of the movie that still makes the movie sound like a giant killer electric eel movie. It's not. And I don't know where that giant killer electric eel on the box art came from because it sure as hell isn't in this movie. God, how I wish it was. I'll get to my rant about that momentarily.

First, I feel compelled to give everyone the head's up on the company that produced this movie in case you aren't already familiar with UFO Films. They are a low budget film production company whose movies either go direct to video or premiere on the Sci-Fi Channel or sometimes UPN before moving on to video store shelves. They pride themselves on creating special effects oriented action genre movies with a particular aim at marketing the movies overseas. After all, special effects blockbusters do huge business internationally. Unfortunately, one could hardly call their movies blockbusters unless you use the phrase "cheap rip-off of Hollywood blockbusters," which far too many of their movies are. And their special effects are usually only special in much the same manner that one would refer to a mentally handicapped person as "special." Dragon Fighter, Silent Warnings, Python, and the Interceptor Force movies are just a few examples of UFO Films' product line.

Once again, they've produced another knock-off of a Hollywood blockbuster; only Deep Shock isn't another Jaws retread as the DVD box art would lead you to believe. Nope, it's a piss poor carbon copy of The Abyss. Now I'm going to be honest with you. I've never cared for The Abyss. I still remember sitting in the theater watching it on opening weekend and while it definitely had some stunning visuals, I just didn't care for the movie. Nothing really clicked with me on that one. I had no emotional attachment to the characters and never felt caught up in the story. Many people think The Abyss is a masterpiece and that's just fine with me. However, of all of James Cameron's movies, I'd rank The Abyss as my least favorite and that's even taking Piranha 2: The Spawning into consideration. With that in mind, imagine how I'm going to feel about watching a cheaper knock-off that has even flimsier characters and none of the visual eye candy.

In the interest of time, I'm just going to quote the plot description for Deep Shock from IMDB since it does a better job describing the basic set-up than I could.

"The American nuclear-powered attack submarine USS Jimmy Carter is attacked a mysterious underwater object, which stalks and disables the Seawolf-class super-sub with a powerful electromagnetic pulse. The underwater arctic research complex Hubris witnesses the attack and reports a rapid rise on the temperature emanating from the Polaris Trench which threatens to melt the ice cap and floor the world's land surface. At an emergency United Nations scientific conference, Hubris director Dr. Ann Fletcher is dismissed when she urges caution and her archrival Dr. Chomsky pushes through a far more aggressive plan to deal with the crisis. When Chomsky's plan fails and contact with the Hubris complex lost, Dr. Fletcher is asked to participate in a follow-up expedition by her ex-husband, Navy Captain Andy Raines, which also includes Chomsky. Once at the North Pole, the expedition finds that the Hubris complex is completely intact, but its personnel have been incinerated. Dr. Fletcher makes a starling discovery that could change the fate of the world while Dr. Chomsky has a secret that could seal the fate of the world ... or end it!"

You know right off that bat the moment you find out the Captain and the scientist are a divorced couple where this is heading, but I'll give the movie its due for at least the first 20 minutes as they still seemed promising. The film did a good job actually making it seem as if there was a sense of urgency to the proceedings. Unfortunately, about the time the crew arrives at the damaged sub the pacing slows dramatically and that sense of urgency is replaced by a sudden realization that you're watching a knock-off of The Abyss that seems to get slower and slower as the film progresses. In fact, the only thing that will probably hold your attention by the end is spotting and pointing out all the stuff that was "sampled" from The Abyss. For crying out loud, the "eels" have virtually the same exact motivations as the aliens from The Abyss. It even dares to copy the scene where the female lead reaches out to touch one.

But let's pretend for a moment that Deep Shock was actually a thrilling, thoughtful, science fiction film or a fun monster movie about giant killer electric eels. Even if it were, Deep Shock would still be dead in the water. Why? Take one more look above at the monstrous eel on the box art and now take a good look at the actual "eels" that appear in the movie. Take a good look at the sentient, alien "eels" with heads that look like, I don't know, seahorses, My Little Pony, or maybe Puff, the Magic Dragon? They're all the more embarrassing because these silly-looking, poorly animated CGI creatures are actually supposed to exude a sense of menace at times as they brutally electrocute people and plot to wipe out humanity. Yeah, the Earth will really tremble at the fins of these escapees from a kiddy flick. I'm sorry but there is no excuse for this. That's just pathetic.

You really have to feel for David Keith. Most recently seen as Matt Murdock's dad in Daredevil, Keith is an underrated actor who deserves far better roles than he generally gets. He sure as hell deserves better than this.

If you really want to watch a fun, low budget B-movie that rips off The Abyss but has neat monsters and doesn't make you want to throw something at your television set that I suggest you try tracking down a copy of the 1990 movie Endless Descent. It even features R. Lee Ermey in his most subdued performance ever and the always-reliable Ray Wise from Jeepers Creepers 2. Yeah, it's cheesy as hell but it's still a hell of a lot more entertaining than Deep Shock.

Now if only someone would make me a Jaws clone about a giant, man-eating, killer electric eel.

1 STAR